It would soon be time for Daniel's next shot in his rabies treatment, so they needed to find a doctor. Daniel would take the opportunity to ask about any places where it was possible to do a DNA analysis. As an excuse, he would tell the doctor it was because he was concerned he had inherited a genetic disorder he had just learned his sister had.
"So, what did the doc say?" O'Neill asked, as soon as Daniel stepped out of the door from the clinic.
"She gave me the shot, and then I asked about the DNA analysis. She said there was a lot of places where I could get that done, but that I probably couldn't afford it." Daniel looked unhappy. "Seems it's common for many workplaces to ask for a DNA analysis of people before they hire them - to make sure they don't have a heightened risk of disease, or something."
"What? That's outrageous!" O'Neill exclaimed.
"Yeah, I agree." Sam frowned. "And it also implies that DNA tests have become a lot simpler and cheaper than they were 12 years ago!"
"Well, maybe, but that doesn't really help us, does it?" O'Neill said.
"Maybe it does. We just need to find one of the labs that performs those tests, and see if we can get to their equipment. Today is Friday. If we can find a place nearby that has the right equipment for the tests, and we're lucky and they're closed over weekend, we could perhaps get it done without anyone noticing," Sam suggested.
"You mean break in?" Jacob asked.
"Yes, why not?"
"Okay, I'll buy that plan. How do we find a DNA lab?" O'Neill wondered.
"The internet. There's an internet cafe over there." Sam indicated a small establishment at the corner across from where they were standing.
"What did you learn?" O'Neill asked.
"That the equipment to do DNA analyses has become fast, simple, and cheap - and that they're fairly ubiquitous," Sam told them. "There's even a small lab in this town, which offers up DNA tests."
"Wow, how did you find out?" Daniel wondered.
"When I did a search for DNA analysis, an ad popped up along with the results. It would seem they are targeted according to both your location, and what you are searching for."
"Creepy... but useful in this case, I guess," O'Neill said.
"Anyway, the doctor was right, Daniel. While they offer to do it in an hour - as insane as that sounds - it costs almost 1000 dollars."
"Crap. We've got less than 900 dollars left after Daniel's doctor visits." O'Neill looked unhappy.
"Sorry," Daniel said.
"Nah, don't worry about it. We'll go with Carter's plan and break in tonight. Come on - let's go check out the place."
"I had never thought I would be stealing a car!" Jacob complained.
"It's all for the good of the planet, remember? If we don't make it out of here, who else is going to fight Ba'al?" Sam said, as she fiddled with some wires.
Jacob snorted. "I suppose that is true."
"Just keep guard, okay?" Sam found the wires she was looking for. She was really happy they had managed to find an old car with no alarms. She had not had a hard time picking the lock earlier. She felt a little guilty, though, as it was obviously a well taken care of classic. The owner would be very unhappy.
"Yeah, yeah. Just hurry up, okay?"
Sam grinned. "I never thought I would be stealing car's either - and with my dad! How's that for a father-daughter activity!" She connected the wires, and revved the engine. "Okay, good to go. Let's go pick up the others!"
"I wonder why there wasn't any guards," O'Neill whispered, looking around.
Sam shrugged. "It's a small town, and this is a small company. When I looked it up online, it really sounded like DNA analysis isn't considered much more high-tech than being a cable guy or something."
"Stop!" Martouf said in a low voice. "There's a camera over there..." He quickly fired at it with his zat'nik'tel, overloading the circuits in it.
"Okay, so I'm guessing the stuff we're after is behind that door." Sam pointed.
"I agree." O'Neill walked up to the door and examined it. "No wires - at least it doesn't look that way, though there's a key card reader." He pressed down the handle. "Locked. Figures."
"Let me take a look at that card reader," Sam said, kneeling beside the door. She started fiddling with it, then got it opened so she could access the circuitry.
"Hurry up!" O'Neill hissed, looking nervously in the direction they had entered from. He looked at the small walkie talkie he was carrying, almost expecting Jacob to call any minute, telling them someone was coming. If the thing even worked. It was part of a set they had bought in a gadget store, and had been quite cheap. It looked to be mostly meant as a toy, but it had worked well enough when they tested it earlier.
"I'm trying! It's not like anything I've seen before. Just give me a few minutes..."
"Would it work to just short-circuit the damn thing?" O'Neill asked.
"Ah, I'm not sure..." Sam began.
"Move aside, Carter... Martouf - shoot the card reader," O'Neill ordered.
Martouf and Sam looked at each other, then both shrugged and Sam stepped aside.
"It's worth a try, I guess."
Martouf fired at the device, and sparks flew from it, then there was a sound as if from an electronic lock releasing.
"Haha. Told you!" O'Neill grinned happily, as he went to open the door and step inside. The room was dark, and he turned on his flashlight. "Okay, which of these is the DNA analysis thingie?"
Sam turned on her flashlight as well, and quickly checked. "This one over here... and it's small enough that we can take it with us. Impressive!"
"Something in here has a naquadah signature," Martouf observed.
"A symbiote?!" O'Neill asked, concerned.
"No... probably one of these devices." He walked over to check on the one Sam was examining. "This one... and it even looks as if it was either heavily inspired by Goa'uld technology, or perhaps created by a Goa'uld, staying on this planet."
"Perhaps produced and sold by Ba'al. He's pretending to be an Earth businessman, after all," Sam observed.
"And would probably need some locally acquired wealth, in order to make it all look credible. Yeah, I think that's right." O'Neill said.
"Well, I guess that explain how there could have been such an incredible advancement in the technology of DNA analysis..." Sam sighed. "It's Goa'uld tech. Oh, well. Right now I don't care, because that means the device is small enough to carry, and apparently works quickly enough that we can get the results in an hour! That is, if I can figure out how the damn thing works!"
"You can figure that out later. Let's get out of here!" O'Neill ordered.
They made it out safely, and joined the others, who were keeping guard.
"Where do we go?" O'Neill asked, when they sat crammed into the car.
"As far away from here as possible," Jacob said, looking nervously out the window.
"Yeah, I got that." O'Neill let the car roll slowly out from the small parking lot outside the building. Another car passed by, and he swore softly, but the driver did not seem to have suspected anything. "I meant, where do we go afterwards? I assume we need to find a place where Carter can play with the DNA thingie, right?"
Well out on the road, he increased the speed. They were in the outskirts of the town, and the streets seemed deserted except for the one car that had just passed them.
"Maybe we could find a motel, or something? Can we afford that?" Sam asked.
"Sure. We've still got more than eight hundred dollars. Since it's not enough to pay for bus tickets to Colorado Springs, we can just as well use some of them to rent a room for the night," O'Neill said.
"That's a great idea. Then we can all get to shower!" Daniel suggested.
"Still bothered by the smell of the rest of us?" O'Neill grinned and rolled his eyes at him.
"If you had my sense of smell, you wouldn't laugh!" Daniel said, sounding offended.
"Duly noted. I'll find a motel - when we've gotten a bit further away from here."
It was near sunrise when they finally rolled into the parking lot of a cheap looking motel.
"We're almost out of gas, but I guess we ought to ditch this car anyway," O'Neill said. "By now it's probably reported stolen."
"Then perhaps we shouldn't park it near the motel where we're going to stay?" Jacob suggested.
O'Neill weighed the options. "I really don't feel like a long walk, but I guess you're right. What do you say we park somewhere in that little forest we passed a short while ago?"
"That could work," Jacob agreed. "We can probably hide it there so it won't be found for a couple days, at least."
"By then we should hopefully be far away," O'Neill said, turning the car around.
Sam groaned. "How far away was that forest?"
"Seven or eight klicks." O'Neill grinned. "Sorry, Carter."